Five Fatherly Facts About Having a Baby [From A Guy That Has A Few]
25 May
So you’ve recently had a baby and now you’re left wondering what in the world you do now. You went to those stupid classes, read the books, listened to your Mother In-Law ad nauseam about what to do if XYZ happens, and you even watched the VHS tapes at the hospital. Yeah, the state budget must really be hurting if they bill the new parents if they don’t remember to rewind the tapes before leaving. Heck, I barely remembered to bring the baby home. Don’t worry guys, Noob Dad has you covered.
Here are five things to remember to help you through this chaotic phase in life.
Babies cry, A lot. Lean to live with it
When your little bundle of joy is mad, he cries. Tired? Cries. Hungry? Cries. Too warm? Too cold? More crying. The sooner you accept this the sooner your blood pressure will settle down.
No book can fully prepare you for what is to come
Sure, those books come highly recommended from your friends and family (including me) but some things cannot be taught in a book. If you need answers to questions like what to do if the baby has a fever, won’t latch on, keeps pulling his ears or poops purple, books are great. However, if you’d like to know why you 10 month old won’t leave his junk alone or why he insists on throwing EVERYTHING in the trash can, there is no substitute for life experience.
Diaper Genies are a complete waste of money
Ask anyone that owns one.
Pacifiers are a double edged sword
Not literally, of course. If that were the case we’d have a lot more peace and quiet around here. Either that or a lot more “Ah na nuh uh nuh.” For real though, binkies, pacifiers, plugs, whatever you call them can be a huge help to get your little one to sleep or at least quit crying. But try to take it away in six months and all hell breaks loose, don’t say I didn’t try to warn you.
Kids Change Every Facet of Your Life
Having a child is a watershed moment. Your relationship, sex, and finances among countless other things will forever be different – and that doesn’t have to mean for the worse.
