Man Food: Biofuel Gourmet Caffeinated Popcorn
19 May
At least thirteen times a day I scream “MORE CAFFEINE!” and the rest of the time I just scream “THE LOBSTERS ARE GETTING TOO CLOSE!” That second exclamation might have something to do with the first. I’m hopped up most of the day. It’s a nice feeling. I hate sleeping. It’s for the weak.
I consume most of my caffeine through beverages but every once in a while a fiend wants a new fix. Especially when he’s got the jitters and needs some type of sustenance.
Enter Biofuel Gourmet Caffeinated Popcorn.
Ok, this is going to be quick. Imagine a bag of really good kettle corn. It’s sweet and salty in perfect combination. Now imagine taking that bag and shoving so much caffeine in it that your brain would explode if you ate it all. Ok, now tone that back just a hair and stop imagining. You now are picturing BioFuel Caffeinated Popcorn, and it’s real and real delicious.
They lost me at “imagine” but brought me right back with “kettle corn.” I’ve got a terrible imagination but sick-like taste buds. I’m sold. I’m beyond sold. I’m making this my only meal of the day. SOMEONE TELL THAT LOBSTER TO BACK OFF!
